Well good morning! I’ve been completely M.I.A. for the past month. In fact, this past month has been the largest transition period I’ve ever had probably since I moved to D.C. to go to school. With that being said, not every change has been easy. I’m sure you can relate to this. When changes occur, especially as an adult, it’s a very disconcerting process. To add to that anxiety is the fact that your parents can’t help you like they did when you were younger. And your friends can’t really help you either because they’re dealing with problems of their own. To be honest, at first I was angry that there was no one to help me. In my selfish mind I thought that the world owed me something, especially because I was always trying to help other people with their issues. Then, after I realized that was unfair thinking, I began to have the irrational thought that I deserved a person that I could contact on demand to help me with any situation at any time; almost like a Batman type character.
Obviously that didn’t happen and I couldn’t even find an older adult in my life that I could look up to. In fact, when I became honest with myself, I realized that I had never looked up to one single person in my whole life. That actually bothered me a bit. I asked myself why I never had that figure in my life that I saw as perfect that had never let me down and that I looked up to. Many of my friends had that whether it was a relative, a coach, or even a friend. Why did I not have a person like that? I believe it was because at an early age, I realized that all heroes fail at some point. Batman doesn’t always defeat the villain, Superman eventually dies, The X-Men always have someone leaving. No human being is perfect.
Because I knew that early on, I never looked up to anyone because they were just as imperfect as I was. As an adult, you can’t look to constantly depend on someone anymore because that’s an unfair expectation. Instead, what I realized is that heroes are simply the embodiment of the values we individually deem to be the most virtuous. As a result, we’re not necessarily rooting for the hero, we’re rooting for the ideas and values that the hero upholds. That’s the appeal of superheroes. People gravitate to different superheroes because generally, people gravitate to different moral beliefs. Once I realized that, instead of looking for a hero that I could hold on to, I decided to simply take the positive character traits that I saw from others and compile them into a blueprint for the type of man I wanted to be. That way, even if that individual failed, that positive character trait that they had would still be alive and never fail. The way I see it, instead of trying to look for a hero to save me, I decided to be on a quest to constantly better myself so I wouldn’t need a hero. If that causes someone to look up to me and turn me into their hero, that would be great. But, because I’m not perfect, I would rather have the positive things I did live on because those last longer than any hero ever has.